Week 10 & 3 Days: Prenatal Yoga & Fetal Doppler

Prenatal Yoga
I started going to a prenatal yoga class.  I used to take a hot yoga class in this studio and I loved it but I stopped going after I started my IVF cycle b/c I heard that extream heat is not a good thing.  I ABSOLUTELY love this prenatal class.  The class consists of 10+ pregnant ladies and before the class starts, each of us talks about the week we are in, discomfort, books we are reading, etc.  There are 2 girls who are having twins and I cannot help but to wonder if they suffered IF and had an IF treatment.  I am the newbie and youngest (in terms of the pregnancy length).  It's such a neat feeling to be surrounded by this many pregnant women and share the moment of tranquility.  The instructor Cathy is amazing and the atomospher of the class is so Zen peaceful and relaxing.      

Fetal Doppler

I went back and forth about purchasing a fetal doppler, but I decided to go ahead and order, so it arrived today.  I know some girls listen to their baby's HB for a peace of mind.  I wasn't sure if it would freak me out a little, but my purchase decision came down to this.  DH's friends are coming in town for the labor day weekend this weekend.  We don't get to see them much because they either moved to a different city or have 2+ kids and their lives are so busy.  They are having a grill out and we are planning on going.  DH said "I want to announce our pregnancy news to them."  I was like "But, I will not be in the safe zone by this Sunday..."  I told him that I will think about it.  I know I am almost there, but I am so scared of the thought that I will find out that the baby's HB stopped after we tell our friends.  I personally wanted to wait until I go into NT scan between 11 - 13 weeks and get a confirmation of the healthy baby.

DH is so excited and cannot wait to let his friends know and I totally understand, so I thought "Maybe I can purchase a fetal doppler to hear the baby's HB."  The manual came with it said it is suitable to use after the 12th week of pregnancy.  However, I have seen girls being able to detect HB earlier than that.  I gave it a shot and tried.  It came with a jel so I put decent amount on my tummy and tried to detect a HB.  Hmmmmm...it's not as easy as I thought!  I even watched YouTube video, but how do you know where the fetus is located at???!!  After trying for a couple of minutes, I thought I heard some beating sound, but I am not sure if this is it.  I guess I have to practice more at home to get a hang of it :P

Oh, one more thing! I had nosebleed twice last weekend.  It freaked me out because I never never get it.  Of course I googled bunch and learned that it's a common pregnancy symptom.  I told DH about it and he said "Yeah, I heard that women have a period from their nose when they get pregnant."  I don't know if he was serious or joking, but it cracked me up!  

Week 9 & 7 Days: Happy 5th Anniversary & Time for A New Project

Anniversay
Happy 5th anniversary!!!  Today is a such beautiful day with the blue sky and the sun is shinning.  I cannot believe it's been already 5 years since we said "YES" to our forever life together.  Since we are middle of packing to move next week, we decided to stay in town and just go to our favorite restaurant "Local 127" tonight.  We take turns to plan our anniversary weekend.  It's his turn this year and he is planning on a secret trip somewhere in the beginning of October.  I am so excited!  I am especially excited because I will be in a safe zone by the time October comes and we can talk so much about our future with our baby.   

I am still so much in love with him.  Everytime we face difficulties in our lives, our relationship gets tigher.  We of course disagree certain things, but we can discuss pretty much anything and come to a conclusion together.  We respect, trust and love each others, which are key to a successful marriage, I believe. 

New Project
We met in 2005 and got married in 2007.  I am not too crafty person, but I like to take pictures and keep movie/concert tickets, so I decided to do a scrap booking project.  This has been going on since 2005, so the book is pretty thick!  It's so hard to remember what we do every year, so this is a great way to remember our time in the past.  I update once every year and this is my wedding anniversary gift to him every year.  It's a lot of fun and I love that how it tells special stories of us.   

Last anniversary, I thought to myselft that, there might not be one for next year as we were ready to start trying.  I was thinking I will come up with a new project for our addition if it happens.     


Our Memory Scrap Book

I DID come up with an awesome new project!  Instead of a scrap booking, I decided to have a "Dear Baby Pregnancy Memory Book".  I printed out pregnacy's weekly notes (the size of the baby, baby status of the week & pregnacy symptoms).  Also, I added a section called "From Your Mommy & Daddy" to the page.  Basically, both of us read the weekly pregnancy note once a week at dinner and write a little message to our future baby.  If I get a u/s pic, I will stick in there.  I am also thinking, I will add my bump pictures once it started showing :)      

Every day, every week of the pregnancy is so precious, so I want to remember our feelings.  I would like to eventually give this book to our son/daugher when he/she grows up.  I want him/her to know that we loved him/her so much even before he/she is born.   

Dear Baby Pregnancy Memory Book



Week 9 & 2 Days: Hello There, Morning Sickness!

I read somewhere 75% of pregnant women experience morning sickness.  The rest of them don't feel anything much and breeze through their pregnancy process.  I know a girl who didn't know that she was pregnant until 5 months until when she felt a movement in her belly.  I didn't really have a symptom of m/s, so I thought I won't have any.....WRONG!! 

It kicked in when I hit 8 weeks.  The name "Morning Sickness" is so deceiving because it comes and goes throughout the day.  Mine is not as bad as some other people, but it's new to me so I need to get used to this!  Here are a couple of strange phenomenons I started experiencing

• I lost appetite for food and I don't know what I want to eat.  My favorite food such as Pasta, Asian food, Fillet, Cookies & Cream ice cream, etc are not too appetiting to me anymore.  
• I am not hungry, but if I don't put something in my stomach, nausia starts.  I keep eating so often and it's actually tiring.
• I became picky about certain food.  I cannot absolutely eat certain food I used to eat: Strawberry, Cookies & Cream ice cream, yogurt, corn, etc   

Last week was tough because I wasn't prepared for m/s and didn't know what works and what doesn't.  I got some ideas from girls from the PAIF, so here are my food stock for the week!



My survival food for the week 9

My DH planned a surprise dinner date on Saturday night.  He remembered that I had a big craving for a greasy hamburger sometimes on week 7, so he planned a theme date night called "Old America"  He took me to a Red Robins for burgers and we went to play a putt-putt!  It was so much fun and I had my first hole-in-one!  The place gave nme an ice cream sandwitch because I got a hole-in-one, so I ate it on the way home.  Unfortunately.......my baby didn't like it.  It made me almost vomit when I got home.  Yikes...I guess I have to get an approval from him/her on food.  My comment to him/her was..."Hey, little guy/girl, you are in charge of me now, so you decide whatever you want, I will eat / not eat!!!!"        


Other physical changes

I think my cramp is gone, but my belly is bloated.  I know I am not considered showing yet, so this is just a bloat, but I know there is a tiny little but beautiful life in me :)  Oh, I learned that it's no longer a embryo.  It's a fetus from the week 9, so it is (I hate to call it a "it"!) a size of an olive and she/he is becoming more like a baby. 

I stopped Crinone progestrone gel so my infection (Yes, Crinone gave me a something similar to yeast infection!) is gone, too!      

Sleeping posture is a big challenge.  I heard that sideway is the best, but I tend to move while sleeping, so I have an extra pillow between my lesg to keep myself positioned right.

Belly Bloat

Week 8 & 5 Days: 2nd U/S and Graduation from RE

Here we go.   Today was the second U/S @ RE.  Was I nervous?  Yes, totally and scared.  I think I will always be worried about the progress & well-being of my baby until the day of his or her arrival.  I cannot help it and I think a lot of women (esp. women who struggled with IF) feel that way.

I did eventually overcame from the sadness of my other empty sac at the first u/s.  I still had a small hope that we might see something today, but at this point, there is nothing we can do.  We are blessed with one child and it was meant to be.  My focus shifted from two to one and I was so anxious about his/her progress.

Before the u/s monitor started capturing, I prayed.  I prayed that I hear good news and I DID!  He/she is there!  Looks bigger than 2 weeks ago!  We saw a flicker of the  HB and Dr. Sheiber said it's beating at 180.  My DH and I were so relieved and we got to hear a HB.  It was beating so fast, and so real.  Wow, really?  I have a life in me?  My tiny little thing is upside down now, but it looks like a mean duck with a big eye and beak !  Or a peanut from a distance :)  Other sac wasn't completely empty and had something, but it was obvious that there was no further development.      

One thing I really appreciate from struggling with IF is that IF made me more appreciative about the whole pregnancy process. Every moment is so precious and I know we will have a family with lots of love.

My Ducky (or Peanut)  <3 <3 <3

 

It was indeed a bitter sweet when Dr. Sheiber said "Well, I am going to send you OB/GYN from now on".  I need to look for a new one because we are moving to Mason, Ohio in 2 weeks.  It was sometimes hard to be at my old ob/gyn office before I started going to RE.  A lot of pregnant women and kids sometimes.  I was smiling at them when I started TTC, but the smile faded away after months of trying and not getting pregnant.  I felt bad, but I looked away most of the time.  

As I was leaving the RE office, I thanked Dr. Sheiber, nurse, receptionist & SA lab receptionist.  I was getting emotional so I was half crying.  I am glad that I choose this place.  I felt like a lost puppy when I came here, but then I felt protected by an awesome crew and my experience was great.  What an amazing and life changing job RE is.  Of course, they cannot help everyone, but the team must feel so good when their patients become successfully pregnant. My mom is a nurse and she always wanted me become one.  Being a nurse never really crossed my mind, but I would consider becoming an IVF nurse in my second life.            

Week 6 & 5 days: My First U/S Since Beta

Today was a big day.  In deed, it was one of the important milestones of my journey!

Morning:  I woke up before my alarm went off.  I couldn't fall back sleep so I was gazing at my bed ceiling and started thinking..."Ok, here we go.  The day is here.  I am hoping for good news, but I need to think about a plan in case if the result wasn't good...hmmm...cry my balls out?  Drink until I pass out???  I will just have to see...."

At the clinic:  My DH went with me the RE office.  Our appointment was on time and when we were waiting in a u/s room, my DH said "I am getting nervous".  It was a vaginal u/s.  Dr. Sheiber came in with a big smile.  He is really nice and makes me comfortable with what I am going through.  When he started monitoring my uterus, I almost wanted to close my eyes.  I did see 2 sacs, but I didn't know what I was seeing.  Dr. Sheiber said "Well, let me see more....I will tell you it's a good result though".  He said I have a very good looking embie with yolk sac & pole.  He pointed where something was blinking.  He said it's a heartbeat.  He didn't tell me the heartbeat rate and I forgot to ask.  The embie looked like a seahorse!!  It's amazing...it is my first time to see non-empty uterus.  Then, I started wondering about the black empty sac next to it.  Dr. Sheiber said "It could be that the embryo is a slow developer.  We will have to see what happens at the next u/s."

To be honest, I was disappointed and sad when I heard that.  I am not sure if it is going to survive or it is already gone.  Isn't it considered a m/c at this point?  I am very happy that I have one strong and healthy one, but I hate seeing others not surviving in this journey.  I guess I made myself to believe I have awesome eggs & uterus for some reason so all embies should survive...but obviously, that's incorrect.

At home:  I cannot stop looking at the picture!  It's a strange feeling that I have a life (or lives) in my at this moment.  I used to get grossed out when other people put their baby u/s picture on their FB, but I see it as a beautiful picture.  Having a baby is truly a miracle and like a magic!  My DH told me at dinner that he is very happy about having one.  He is concerned about twin pregnancy risk and all the extra work (everything needs to be for 2).  For me, I still hope the other will pop out at the next u/s in 2 weeks, so I am sending a lot of positive & growing vibes to my belly!!!!  

No more empty uterus!